Well, I had quite the lovely morning surprise yesterday.
I woke up around 11AM, thrilled to have slept in on a Monday (the worst day of the week, as is well known).
I pulled on some jeans (of medium cleanliness) and began what I THOUGHT would be a leisurely stroll down to Dunkin' Donuts for an Ice-Hazelnut-With-Skim-Mile-And-Three-Splendas.
I walked into the park across the street from my building and what do you think I saw?
This is what I saw:
An old man sitting on a bench with NO PANTS ON!
Mind you, I'm lucky enough to live in a very nice part of Manhattan, not the type of area that one expects to see such sights.... not that 'one' should expect that anywhere, but you get the point. There were plenty of mothers and babysitters with their little kiddies running around, but no one had thought to do anything about the man presenting his business for all to see.
So, of course, I took it upon myself.
I called 911 and told the dispactcher that there was a man exposing himself in the park. She asked me what he was wearing. I told her that I honestly can't recall what he was wearing because I was more focused on what he was NOT wearing - HIS PANTS! Geez.
Being the exemplary semaritan that I am, I then stood at the corner and warned all unsuspecting parents about to make their way into the park about the menace awaiting within until our friendly men in blue arrived.
(By the way - WHAT is Wrong with people? Why did none of the mothers running around the park with their children do anything? The man and his valuables were pretty hard to miss! Did they think it was alright for their children to learn the facts of life in such a special way?)
Anyway, when I finally made it to Dunkin' Donuts, I found the young Lebonese proprietor standing in the doorway, hollaring at a man on a bicycle in a sweet sweet mixture of English curses and miscellanious words from at least two other languages.
I politely waited for a lull in the commotion and asked if I could please have my usual order at which point she turned to me and yelled: "Can't you see I'm busy?!" and continued her tirade.
Ergo, my friends, my Memorial Day, I-Slept-In-On-A-Monday bliss was ruined and I was forced to run (RUN) to Starbucks, which I have been trying to quit, and gulp down a triple-grande-skim-mocha-with-whip to calm my nerves.